That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
We left an ass print on the piano.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
