and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
We need to get me chipped asap
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize