we have pet lesbian snakes
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
Randomize
