Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
Randomize
