When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I deserve to be covered in dicks
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
