i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
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