remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
