Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize
