TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
