Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
