Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
damnit. I just found my cousin on tinder.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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