I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Randomize
