you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
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