Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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