went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
