Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
You ran down the alley towards a stranger screaming "you took my beer".... Then proceeded to run into a garage, fall down, and scream about how your shirt makes you look fat.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
WTF was I supposed to tell them? "hi mom and dad, this is some rando I met on the internet. please ignore the noises that will be coming from my bedroom for the next 60-90 minutes. kthxbye."
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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