Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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