the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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