This girl is more easily done than said...
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
