I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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