apparently the secret to your success is patron
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
