dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Randomize