I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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