Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
