you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize
