My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
