I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Drunk is not a location!
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
