i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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