break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Randomize
