this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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