i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Was awful. Wedding photos taken by a river with used syringes floating past. Had to ask the bride to put down a can of rum to have her photo taken.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
Randomize