i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
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