This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize