but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
4 words: hood of his car
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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