The maid of honor just puked.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
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