I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
love makes seman taste better
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize
