Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Randomize
