good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
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