Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
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