Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Randomize