I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Randomize