Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Randomize
