So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
