Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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