oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
So essentially hes paying me $150k/year for the rest of his career to not have sex
SERIOUSLY? WTF! why cant I find a super hot, super gay, super conservative christian NFL player in need of a beard?
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
Randomize
