Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
one of the cashiers from Kroger is eating at my kitchen table and nobody knows why.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Is it penis luge time yet?
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
