You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
