This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Damn victory sex feels great
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
