yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
Randomize
