Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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