btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
Just witnessed a man yell "gonna catch a slut!" at himself in the mirror while doing bicep curls at the gym.
I was...perplexed.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
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